When a Dream is Your Past Reality

Have you ever had a dream so vivid, you swear it really happened?

Everything you experience in your dream seems real…the people in it, your family and friends, teachers, colleagues. The setting is familiar and comfortable, like you’re at home or work, at a restaurant or vacation spot. And then it hits you, like when a bug flies into your mouth—you behaved in a way you never dreamed of behaving. But you just did.

I had a dream last night and I awoke dumbfounded over my uncharacteristic behavior. In my dream I was supposed to give a speech in celebration for an organization. A noteworthy nod of clout, judging by the way my heart palpitated in slumber panic. Fun Fact: This was not my first unrestful public speaking dream. Having competed in high school speech contests, more than once I’ve had that, “Oh crap, I can’t remember anything” dream right as I’m next to speak. But hey, at least I’ve never dreamt I was naked at the podium (Thank you Jesus.)

In this dream, mindless non-eventful chaos kept me from getting to the event in question and as time was running out, I didn’t take the time to tell anyone I wasn’t going to make it there. Very unlike me to not notify if I am running late—lest of all, not coming. But my subconscious decided it was easier to avoid going altogether and to seek forgiveness after the fact. Basically, instead of confronting the uncomfortable with an explanation prior, I avoided any unpleasantries.

Have you ever done this?

At first, I was like, wait, no—that’s not at all how I behave. That’s not what I would do in that situation.

But as my day evolved, much like the final day of school before summer vacation, I realized my dreamt response was not far away from who I used to be.

You see, I used to be rooted in fear. Anyone else? And fear is an enemy. It keeps us from trying our best, using our gifts and talents, loving others as ourselves. It’s a trust breaker that keeps us from a relationship with a loving God.

“for God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.” - 2 Timothy 1:7, ESV

So often we find it easier to ignore what makes us uncomfortable and cringy (to be clear, avoidance of cockroaches and snakes is totally acceptable). But when you’re crippled by fear from a person or situation, hiding and avoiding only works for so long. And unlike the dream you wake up from, you can’t outrun reality.

Like I said earlier, fear had a definite stronghold on me. I know how easy it is to fall prey to lies of feeling unworthy. I get it. It took me many years to overcome and accept that I am loved, I am forgiven, I am worthy. Another fun fact about me is that I start each day by listening to Zach William’s song, “Fear is a Liar.” It’s a song that reminds me of the truth: I am more than what someone told me I was and I am not who I once was.

What is something you’ve been avoiding?

What fear do you need to release so you can fulfil a dream?